When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize