he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Holy shit dude........stairs
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