have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize