like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
