i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
