I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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