you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Randomize
