i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
