Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
