carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
NoShamevember. You game?
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize