It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
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