But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
It's no shave November. This is our time.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
