And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
