Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
