I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
