after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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