the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
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