Got a toothbrush?
Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize