I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Randomize
