I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
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