His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
