Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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