Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
