This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize
