my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
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