69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
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