ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
