I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
