If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
