This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
