we have officially lost it.
the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
