And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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