I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
