And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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