Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
