Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
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