You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
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