Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
It's not a walk of shame if you run
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
