I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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