She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
