So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize