well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
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