But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
