South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
