Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(315): View more from New York

i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.

(402): View more from Nebraska

Update, its a couple

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(803): View more from South Carolina

There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...

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(952): View more from Minnesota

Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?

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(916): View more from California

I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake

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(862): View more from New Jersey

Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.

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(206): View more from Washington

you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.

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(303): View more from Colorado

When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying

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