At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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