When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Randomize