how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
