ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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