She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
