My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
